They say you don’t know what you have until it’s gone. At first I thought I truly understood the meaning of this when I had to give up all things gluten and dairy, but boy was I wrong! Coffee has been my drug since the 8th grade (which is alarming in and of itself) and for the past 8 years, I haven’t thought twice about consuming 2-4 cups of day, especially since I drink a ton of water.
About one week ago, the unthinkable happened: I was told I have to significantly reduce my caffeine intake for various reasons, and needless to say, the past 7 days have been some of the longest days of my life. I have even questioned how much of my personality coffee makes up, hence the photo above. If you’re like me and drink coffee like it’s water, please consider the following before attempting to survive off 8oz of coffee per day.
Your 4pm need-coffee-headache-alarm won’t stop ringing
You have to unsubscribe from Starbucks emails because they are just a constant reminder of your new normal (and the lack of gold stars you’re going to have)
You can’t watch shows like Gilmore Girls where kidney-failing levels of coffee consumption are glorified
You drink excessive amounts of green tea just to have a to-go coffee cup in your hand
You feel seriously accomplished when you go to be and can honestly say you’ve only had 1 cup of coffee
You have to unfollow those cozy, aesthetically pleasing coffee shop social media accounts like @revelatorcoffee, @blacktapcoffee, and @acmeandco because they’re just too tempting (and why pay $3 for a cup of decaf?!)
You find yourself thinking and talking about coffee like it’s the ex you’re still not over
You find yourself drinking thy that shall not be named *DECAF* hoping it will trick your body into thinking it’s legit
*all photos taken from Google Images